


as sweet as the sound

by yspir



Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: Everyone Is Alive, F/M, Found Family, M/M, the relationships are tagged and theyre in here but the main focus is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:15:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 20,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27616099
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yspir/pseuds/yspir
Summary: "'I love it,' Luke said and smiled, but while the two of them started trying to work on a melody he felt a bit of guilt creep into his chest. It wasn’t the first time that working with Julie had made him feel this way. His mom was still alive. He missed her and his dad all the time and they were still alive and every day he chose not to talk to them."A 'the band is alive' AU where Julie and Luke help each other get their moms back even without the help of the supernatural
Relationships: Alex/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Julie Molina/Luke Patterson, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 49
Kudos: 292





	1. Chapter 1

Luke was going to _murder_ Bobby Wilson. Or Mr. Wilson, maybe, for getting a new job in a different state and forcing the whole family to pick up and move away at the end of the summer. Bobby had told the band at rehearsals that afternoon, then told them all he was quitting the band immediately as it “didn’t make any sense to waste my time here anymore if I’m leaving anyways.” _Waste his time_ Luke thought incredulously, as if the band wasn’t the most important thing in the world to the rest of them. His head was racing the whole way home, mentally rearranging songs he had already written to exclude Bobby and sifting through possible new rehearsal locations. He ditched his bike in the front yard and flung open the front door, hoping to avoid his parents completely on his way to his room. 

“Oh, you’re back early,” his mom said, poking her head around the corner from the living room and then following Luke into the kitchen. She sounded pleased. Luke gritted his teeth. 

“Something came up,” he said shortly. 

She got this knowing look on her face that made Luke squirm. He tried to ignore her, choosing to dig around in the fridge instead. “Did Bobby finally tell you boys about…”

Luke slammed the fridge door and spun on his heel. “How long have _you_ known?”

“His mom mentioned it to me a few weeks ago. It’s a shame, he seems like a nice boy. He’s got a lovely family.” 

_That makes one of them_ Luke thought spitefully. “What he’s _got_ is a part in all of our songs and a perfect garage for band rehearsals,” Luke grumbled. 

His mom reached out to squeeze his shoulder. “Well, this little experiment had to end at some point, didn’t it?”

“ _This little experiment_?” Luke was trying not to yell but he was actually starting to feel a bit lightheaded. He knew she hated his band and his music and his guitar (that she gave him!), but would it kill her to be even a little understanding for once? “This ‘little experiment’ isn’t over yet!”

“Watch your tone,” she admonished. “Luke, honey, you know I love you but a bunch of teenagers playing one off shows in seedy clubs was never going to last forever. Now that you’ve lost a member it might be a good time to let it go, right?” She said it so gently, so plainly, like it was supposed to be some sort of comfort and that was just it. She didn’t get it. She would never, _ever_ get it no matter how hard he tried. 

“It doesn’t have to be, we’ll figure it out!” he nearly growled, not caring one bit about his tone. He knew where this was going already, had known the whole time. It was just a different version of the same argument they had all the time. 

He braced himself for the familiar screaming match and was, for once, actually caught off guard by what his mother had to say to him. “It’s time for you to focus on school, Luke. On your future.” That part was normal. “Maybe what your dad and I need to do is confiscate that guitar of yours until you graduate.” That part was new and so utterly unthinkable that Luke almost didn’t know how to react.

He narrowed his eyes. “You wouldn’t.”

His mom crossed her arms. “I would.” She and Luke argued often enough that Luke was pretty good at telling when she was bluffing, and he was horrified to realize that this was not one of those times. She said she was going to confiscate his guitar and she really, actually meant it. He instinctively gripped onto his guitar strap like a lifeline. He would be separated from his guitar _over his dead body._

He didn’t know how to make her understand that losing his guitar would be like losing a limb — or worse. Without his music, Luke Patterson would simply cease to exist. It was that easy. He tried so, _so_ hard to make her get it, told her these things a thousand times, and he couldn’t help but think she was being willingly obtuse at this point because _every single person_ that knew Luke understood this like it was a basic fact of the universe. 

“Then I’ll leave,” he said, low, as a white hot flash of anger went through him. “If you’re going to take my guitar then I’ll leave right now and never come back.” 

He heard his mom yelling “You’ll do no such thing!” at his back as he stormed off but he didn’t listen. 

There were tears pricking at his eyes as he made his way down the hall, clenching his fists, but as soon as he slammed his bedroom door shut behind him it was like a switch flipped. He dumped all of his books and papers out of his backpack straight onto the floor, feeling a little frantic. He could feel the rage coming in waves as he stomped haphazardly around his room. _Fine,_ he thought, blindly shoving anything that felt vaguely important into his now empty school bag. _If that’s how it’s gonna be._

When he stormed back out of his room with his bag and guitar in tow he still hadn’t fully made up his mind, but the adrenaline coursing through him was enough already that he wasn’t thinking through anything, just doing. His mom was there waiting for him and he could hardly hear anything that was said over the volume in his head. There was a lot of screaming, Luke said a lot of things he never ever wanted to say and didn’t even mean in the first place. He could only hope the same was true for his mom, but. She sounded like she meant it. That was the only thing Luke could really remember of his last minutes living in that house. 

He didn’t let himself look back before he turned the corner, disappearing from her sight completely. If he had seen her face it might have convinced him to turn around, to come right back. He almost did anyways, just hearing her cry. He didn’t. It wasn’t until he was a few blocks away that the adrenaline from the heat of the moment started draining from his body, giving him a chance to think clearly about what he had just done. He pulled off the main road and found his way to a park bench, leaning his bike up against it while he caught his breath. 

He didn’t formulate much of a plan before taking off, that wasn’t really his style, but now that he had left he didn’t have anywhere to go. He thought of Reggie, then immediately cringed when he thought about all the nights Reggie had spent at Luke’s avoiding his own parents. Luke had dealt with enough already without telling Reggie that one of his safe places was off the table for the foreseeable future. Alex it was then. 

Alex picked up his phone right away like he always did. “Hey man, what’s up?”

“I, uh, might have done something kind of drastic?”

“Luke…” Alex started but Luke cut him off. 

“Let’s not get into it right now, you can call me an idiot tomorrow. I just kind of need a place to stay tonight.”

Alex sighed heavily. “Dude, I’m — I wish I could — you know how my parents have been since… They’ll get suspicious and say no if I ask but if I sneak you in and we get caught—”

“Hey, no, you’re right, I’m not making you deal with that. I’ll figure something else out.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Luke said, putting some of that signature frontman confidence back in his voice. “Don’t even worry about it.” That probably would’ve worked on almost anyone but Alex who knew him far too well. 

He sighed again. “I’m really sorry man.”

“Not your fault,” Luke cut in gently because he may well be sleeping on a park bench but there wasn’t a chance in hell that he would let Alex apologize for that. “Never ever your fault. Don’t apologize.”

Alex laughed softly. “Stop trying to comfort me, this is about your crisis.”

“Nah, it’s all good. No crisis here.”

“If you say so”

“I do.”

“Okay…” Alex said, clearly unbelieving. “Call me again if you don’t figure anything else out.”

“I will,” Luke lied. “Good night dude.” 

Luke settled in on his bench, snuggling his guitar in close both for its safety and his own. He was going to have to bite the bullet and try Reggie tomorrow, but luckily the day’s events were exhausting enough that even the cold, hard park bench was acceptable for a good night’s rest.

When Luke made it to Alex’s the next morning Reggie was already there. Alex clearly noticed Luke’s disheveled appearance immediately after he opened the front door but he didn’t comment on it. Instead, he wordlessly pulled Luke into a hug before leading him into the kitchen where Reggie was waiting. Luke joined them at the table and let the two of them slide food in front of him, just a glass of water and a piece of toast on a paper towel. 

They sat in silence for a few minutes while Luke distractedly ate the toast. Alex and Reggie were clearly trying not to be pushy. Luke bounced his leg under the table anxiously, trying to gather his thoughts before speaking. He was still trying to process everything and while he had still been in shock the previous night, the morning brought clarity and it was starting to sink in how permanent this was. He made an aborted move to stand up, feeling suddenly like he needed to run or scream or break something. He sat back down abruptly instead and started shredding the paper towel. He was probably getting crumbs all over the table. 

He needed to say something eventually. 

“I—I can’t go back,” he finally blurted. “I—we yelled, and I left, and now—” he cut himself off and started tearing the already shredded paper towel into smaller pieces. 

“Are you sure?” Alex asked hesitantly. “You guys argued a lot but I don’t think she ever actually wanted you to leave.”

Luke’s jaw tensed instinctively. “No, she just wanted me to be a different person entirely,” he muttered lowly. “It doesn’t matter anyways. The things I said— we both said— it's too late now.” He tried to take deep breaths to calm the jittery feeling racing through his body but it was no use. He felt like he needed to do something, anything. Alex and Reggie shared a look before getting up and pulling him into a group hug which was apparently all it took to make Luke finally start crying. 

“Let it out, man,” Alex said, rubbing his back. 

“You’ve still got us, right? That never changes.” Reggie added, and Luke squeezed the both of them extra tight. 

Luke was feeling slightly better when they all sat back down but he knew there was still an order of business that needed to be handled. “I do still need a place to stay, at least for a little bit. I know Alex’s place won’t work,” Alex dropped his head slightly at that and Luke cut him off as he started to open his mouth. “And you’re not allowed to apologize for it.” He pointed sternly at Alex as he said it, knowing that Alex didn’t fully listen to him or Reggie whenever they told him not to feel guilty, but it was the principle. He would say it a thousand times if he had to. “Anyways,” he continued, looking over at Reggie,” I don’t know if your place is an option, I don’t want to make things any worse…”

Reggie just patted his shoulder. “You’re in luck then, there’s no way my parents will notice you moving in right now.” 

Reggie’s unfailing positivity was, as was often the case, simultaneously reassuring and a bit sad. He clearly didn’t want to get into it right then, though, so Luke took the offer for what it was and sighed in relief. “Thanks dude.”

So at least he had that much sorted. Reggie did end up being right, too. It took almost two weeks before either of his parents expressed even the slightest amount of suspicion.

“I’ve seen a lot of you recently.” his dad said one day at lunch, seeming thoughtful, and Luke froze for just a second before shrugging with faux nonchalance. 

“Band stuff, you know? Songs won’t write themselves.”

Reggie’s dad nodded understandingly and wandered off, unbothered. Reggie patted Luke on the chest proudly. “See, I told you he wouldn’t notice a thing.”

So Luke had a place to stay, and Reggie actually seemed to enjoy having his permanent company. In that sense things could have been a lot worse, but it wasn’t going to work long term. Through all of the other drama they hadn’t managed to figure out what to do about the band and it was starting to make Luke antsy. Reggie’s house just didn’t have enough space and Alex’s family was very clear about not wanting to deal with the noise but the three of them didn’t know how to come up with enough money to rent anything for more than a day or two. Luke was trying really really hard not to let this get to him, but before everything went to shit they had actually been getting some recognition at gigs and this whole little adventure had felt like someone had hit the reset button. Luke would rather _die_ than have to crawl back to his parents house and admit that, without Bobby and his garage, the band really was going to have to end. 

Luke was getting into the habit of taking his bike on a familiar route around Reggie’s neighbourhood to clear his head, which is why it felt a little like fate one day when he laid his eyes upon the most beautiful thing he had ever seen despite never having noticed it before. 

“Julie, come grab the other side of this and help me move it.” Luke looked over to the source of the voice and his jaw dropped. Behind the man and his daughter was the most perfect rehearsal space he possibly could have dreamed of. 

He rode his bike up towards their driveway without even realizing what he was doing, and was only shaken out of his stupor when the father put down the box they were moving and cleared his throat. “Can I help you?” he asked mildly and the inside of Luke’s head was screaming _YES_ but he obviously needed to have some tact.

“Sorry,” Luke said, laying on as much charm as possible. He was an expert at talking his way out of detention and into clubs he was definitely not old enough to play in, and he hoped that practice would pay off again now. “I got distracted by the sweet set up in your garage. I’m a musician too,” he said, realizing belatedly that the guitar on his back probably made that part obvious. “My name is Luke, by the way,” he added, sticking out a hand for the man. 

The man shook his hand with a smile. “Nice to meet you Luke, I’m Ray. That’s my daughter Julie,” he said, gesturing to the girl standing behind him. 

Julie nodded and gave him a tight smile and then quickly grabbed something from one of the boxes. “I’m just gonna take this inside,” she said, and then rushed off. 

Ray exhaled gently and turned back to Luke “We were actually trying to clean the place up a bit, we don’t use that stuff anymore so it’s just been collecting dust.”

Luke’s eyes widened. An entire studio, empty and unused and owned by someone who seemed like a generally nice dude. It was the perfect situation if he handled this right. “If you don’t want everything collecting dust I might have a solution for you.”

Ray raised his eyebrows. “You’re looking to take an entire grand piano off my hands?”

Luke grinned. “Not exactly…”

He rode his bike back to Reggie’s as fast as humanly possible, skidding to a halt in the driveway. “Reggie!” he called out as soon as he flung open the front door, slightly out of breath. Reggie appeared quickly and Luke pointed at him before he had a chance to speak. “Text Alex, tell him we’re having a band meeting. I have news.”

Reggie did as he was told and then looked up and cocked his head at Luke curiously. “News?” he asked and he sounded slightly worried so Luke gave him a smile that he had been trying to tamp down. 

“Good news, bro, don’t worry.”

Alex responded almost immediately that he was on his way so Luke and Reggie settled in on the couch to wait. Luke couldn’t sit still. He was jiggling his leg enough that he could tell Reggie was seconds away from sitting on him to make him stop, but he couldn’t help it. It had been _way too long_ since they were able to have full band rehearsal and Luke’s mind was swimming with all of the mostly written songs he hadn’t gotten the chance to finish without the rest of his band. His fingers were twitching with the itch to play some familiar chords. As soon as Alex arrived and plunked himself down on the couch, Luke stood up and broke into a huge grin. “Boys, we have rehearsal tomorrow!” 

Alex and Reggie obviously had questions as to how that was going to work so Luke recounted the day’s events to the both of them. Reggie seemed to accept pretty easily that Luke was able to pull this off with his charm but Alex was still skeptical of his methods. Luke didn’t take offense to this. Someone had to be the sensible one and it certainly wasn’t going to be him. Still, Luke was certain this time that this was going to work out. 

“So what’s the catch?” Alex was asking. “There’s gotta be a catch, right? There’s no way you just rode up and asked to use a strangers garage and he actually said yes.” 

Luke shrugged easily. “Hey, you get things done by doing. Besides, he told me that it would be nice to hear music coming from out there again so maybe we’re actually doing him a favour, too.” Luke flopped sideways back onto the couch and draped himself all over Alex and Reggie. “We can pay him back when we get famous.” Reggie gave him a fist bump for that one.

Alex just patted the shin that ended up on his lap and said “Okay,” in a tone that suggested he was just humouring them, which was good enough for Luke.

When the boys walked up to the studio the next day they were surprised to hear soft piano music already coming from behind the door. “I thought you said—” Reggie started in confusion but Luke cut him off. 

“Shh! I want to listen.” They were all on the same page as they crept a little closer, trying to be as quiet as possible, and that’s when the singing started. 

Luke’s jaw dropped, and when he looked over at Alex and Reggie they were clearly thinking the same thing he was. She — it must’ve been Julie, Luke remembered from the other day — had the most incredible voice he had ever heard. None of them dared make a sound until after the song was over, standing frozen in place where they were when she started. 

Reggie was the one to break the silence. “Do we go in there?” he whispered loudly. 

Luke tried to shake himself out of his state of reverie and mostly succeeded. Alex always made fun of his tendency to look at anything and everything in terms of musical potential, but anyone would understand why Luke was distracted by thoughts of what someone could do with that voice. What a band like Sunset Curve could do with that voice. 

The boys were looking at him expectantly, and, seeing as Luke was the one who set this deal up, he figured he should be the one to go up to the studio doors. He swung them open quietly and the boys all walked in together. The fact that they were all nearly tiptoeing was an accident but the atmosphere in the studio felt fragile and none of them wanted to be the one who broke it by making too loud of a sound. The girl — Julie — was sitting on the piano bench with her eyes closed and— was that a tear? Luke fought the instinct to bolt as soon as he realized how emotional she was. 

The boys all shared a glance again. She clearly didn’t hear them come in, maybe they should have made more noise, and Luke didn’t know how to alert her of their presence without scaring her. He made panicked eye contact with Alex, hoping he would know what to do. Alex shook his head before turning to Julie and saying “Uh, hi.”

If Luke were to make a list of Julie’s talents based on the very limited information he had about her so far it would look like this:  
1\. Singing  
2\. Playing piano  
3\. Screaming really, really loud

They all cringed, and Alex started to stumble out an apology before she asked “Who are you and what are you doing here?” 

At that, Alex and Reggie both started to creep behind Luke as if they would actually be able to hide behind him. “We’re the band your dad is letting use the studio?”

She nodded and Luke could see the moment she remembered, looking less terrified but still slightly frazzled. “I’ll get out of your way then.”

She started hastily gathering up the sheet music that had been spread out in front of her and the polite thing to do probably would’ve been letting her leave unbothered but when Luke was faced with nagging curiosity it made it hard for him to focus. “I thought your dad said no one here used any of that stuff anymore” 

“We don’t, that was just —” 

“Incredible?” Luke cut in. “Seriously, you have one of the best voices I’ve ever heard. You can’t let talent like that go to waste!” 

Reggie nodded beside him. “You gave me goosebumps!”

Julie stood up pin straight, then shook her head. “I don’t have time.”

“Then you should _make_ time.” Luke said and Alex hit his arm. Luke was being a bit pushy, sure, but it was his duty to help bring good music into the world however he could. 

“I’m sorry,” Alex said. “You don’t have to answer to him.”

Julie flicked her eyes between the two of them and then nodded before grabbing her sheet music and slipping out the studio doors. Luke wasn’t going to let that be the end of their discussion forever if he could help it, there was something magical about that girl that he just couldn’t ignore, but for now there was music to be played. 

“So,” He turned back to see one happy and one incredulous expression looking back at him. He grinned and gestured to the rest of the studio. “What do we think?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I said I would come,” she said, keeping her tone as light as possible, but she was distracted. She looked around the studio in disbelief. It was exactly the same as it had been when she sang earlier in the week, and the same as it had been every day for the past year. It’s exactly what she was expecting it to look like when she was bracing herself for the dark cloud to surround her like usual, but it never did. The sunlight was peeking in through the windows and Reggie and Alex were still messing with their instruments and Julie was breathing as easily as she could before she walked in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Minor content note for this chapter: This is from Julie's point of view so it does deal with her perspective of grief. She's in about the same place she is at the beginning of the show but since we're in her head you will hear a little more about what she's thinking.

If she was being perfectly honest, Julie kind of surprised herself when she decided to go out to the studio that morning. But when she found that song… It was the first time she’d read any of her mom’s music in over a year, and she had no idea that this one had even _existed._

Her mom had written that song for her. Her mom had wanted her to _sing_ it. Doing so made her feel the most connected she had felt to her mom since, with her music and her lyrics washing over Julie in a comforting way that should have been familiar. It was, once, and it broke Julie’s heart all over again to realize how long it had been since she had felt that way. She felt like she had been transported somewhere else entirely, to a different universe where things were different and things were better. 

The problem Julie was having with music extended beyond the obvious. How could she possibly go back and do something that makes the loss so painfully and plainly unavoidable? Sitting down on that piano bench alone made the world feel so big and empty that it was crushing and Julie just knew if she stayed there for too long everything would come caving in around her and leave her trapped in the rubble. It wasn’t as bad anymore as it had been at the beginning when it was too raw to even consider, but there was still a dull ache and a cloud of unease that hung over the studio like a spectre and Julie could feel it every time she so much as opened the doors.

That was the part that was expected, probably. It’s why everyone in Julie’s life had encouraged her to play and to sing until those horrid feelings went away. But Julie had tried despite it. She made herself sit in her own room, away from the cloud that had overtaken the studio, and try to put her thoughts to paper. Dr. Turner had told her it would be nice to have an outlet. 

The words never came. There was no tune, no melody. Music used to pour out of her as easy as breathing, but in the few times she had tried since she felt like she was trying to dig the music out of a void, cold and dark and unending. She knew the first time she felt it that when she lost her mom, the music had gone with her. It wasn’t just too painful, it was _gone_ forever in the terrifyingly permanent way that the universe seemed to operate. That emptiness, that darkness where the colour had once been was a part of her now the same way the music used to be. 

Unfortunately despite her sudden ability to sing that song, things weren’t different enough and the normal gloom started creeping back in as soon as she finished. She stayed sitting at the piano for a few seconds trying to fight the darkness from taking over the room again, which is why she felt justified in screaming when the group of boys entered the studio. 

She did remember after the fact, of course, that her dad had offered to let a band rehearse there and she did recognize the one in the beanie from the day before, but. In any case, she decided it would be best to make a quick escape, trying to brush off their questions and make it into the house. She wasn’t expecting them to be so insistent and she wasn’t sure exactly what they wanted from her. It was enough to make her a bit skeptical. Sure, they seemed nice enough but there had to be something going on there. Like, who just rides their bike into a strangers driveway and asks to use their garage? 

Anyways, it didn’t really matter. That was a one-off performance from Julie. She felt like the song needed to be sung, she sang it, it was done. She could now avoid the studio and the suffocating feelings it caused whenever the band was practicing there and that was it. 

Or so she thought, which is why she again found herself screaming a few days later when she walked straight into one of them in the kitchen. “What are you doing here?” she asked with her hand over her chest, trying to slow her heart rate. 

“Sorry!” he said, putting his hands up guiltily. “Your dad said we could snack here if we got hungry.”

“Of course he did.” Julie muttered, shaking her head. He was far too trusting. Seeing as her heart rate had mostly returned to normal, she turned to the fridge to grab stuff for lunch. 

“I’m Luke, by the way.” 

“Julie.”

“Oh, by the way, let us know if you want to use the garage and we’ll stay out of your hair.” Luke offered from behind her. “We didn’t mean to totally take over your studio.”

“It’s not my studio.” Julie didn’t look at Luke as she brought her sandwich ingredients to the counter. “It was my moms.”

Luke slid up next to Julie at the counter smoothly but he looked apologetic for a second before continuing as if this was a very normal conversation for two near strangers to be having. “Come on, you clearly have a musical gift too, we heard you the other day.” 

Julie shook her head. “My mom wrote that song.” She hesitated, not really sure that she wanted to get into this but Luke was just so earnest. “She taught me everything I know, but it was always something we did together. It just doesn’t feel right anymore, not alone.”

“So don’t do it alone.”

Julie raised her eyebrows at Luke, unimpressed. What did he expect her to do, bring her mom back as a ghost?

Luke clearly followed her train of thought and quickly shook his head. “No, I mean, we’re obviously not your mom or anything close but we’re in the studio all the time. Maybe it’ll feel a little better with some company?”

Julie huffed out a sigh. Luke was nothing if not persistent, but Julie knew her own feelings best. She looked away and finished putting her sandwich together. She had plans with Flynn anyways. Flynn had found a boutique that she insisted Julie would love, and Flynn’s fashion judgement was second to none. She was a very punctual person so Julie needed to get going. She grabbed her sandwich from the counter. “I’m sorry, I have somewhere to be.”

“See you around?” Luke asked as she made her way out of the kitchen. 

Julie turned back and nodded, giving him a small smile and answering “See you around,” before making her escape to her bedroom. 

Julie explained the whole situation to Flynn that afternoon while they were sifting through racks of clothes. 

Flynn pulled a shirt off the rack and contemplated it briefly before putting it back. “So your dad invited a bunch of random boys to have their band practice in your mom’s studio?”

“Yeah, pretty much, and one of them found out I used to sing and now he won’t stop bugging me about music stuff.”

“Are they cute?”

Julie gave Flynn an unimpressed look before a small smile crept onto her face. “Yeah, they’re cute.”

Flynn raised her eyebrows. “Well,” she said, “If you want them to leave you alone say the word and I’ll come put some sense into them.”

Julie crossed her arms in faux exasperation. “Would you put some sense into them or do you just want to flirt with them?” 

Flynn brushed a couple of braids over her shoulder. “Who said I can’t do both?” 

Julie laughed and shook her head. If anyone could do it, it would be Flynn. 

“Hey,” she said, handing a hanger to Julie. “Try this on.”

The band was actually pretty good. And Luke was not kidding when he said they were in the studio all the time. During any daylight hours there was noise coming from the studio, solo drumming or electric guitar if not full songs. It probably should have been annoying, and it was sometimes, but more often than not Julie found herself enjoying the way it brought the house some colour. 

She found herself tapping the beat of something they had been playing while she was looking for something to eat. When she closed the fridge Luke was lurking right behind the door and Julie jumped. It was starting to feel like déjà vu. 

“We have to stop meeting like this,” he joked. 

“You’re like a cat, I need to put a bell on you.” Luke laughed as he switched places with Julie to look for a snack. “Whatever you guys were playing earlier sounded really good, by the way.”

Luke lit up as he abandoned the fridge to reach into his pocket and pull out a slightly crumpled piece of paper. “Thanks! It's a new song we’re working on...”

Julie watched Luke as he explained the song he was working on and it was hard for her to miss the way his eyes lit up and the way he was gesturing wildly and completely unintentionally. It was hard to miss because it was so familiar and the recognition prodded at the old ache in Julie’s heart. That was the look of someone who had the music pouring out of their soul, impossible to contain, the way Julie used to. She knew the euphoria of it all too well and at the same time not well enough at all, and in hindsight if she had to guess it was the magnetism of that feeling that made her join in when prompted, singing for the second time that week. The second time that _year_. Luke gave her a pleased smile when they finished. “See? Perfect for you. And, imagine this,” he pointed at the crinkled paper, “with a bit of piano.” 

Julie was slightly surprised. “Which one of you plays piano?” 

“Well none of _us_ do, but…” Luke started and Julie knew she had to shut him down immediately. 

“Luke, no.” 

“Come on, why not? It’d be killer!” 

“I’ve already told you, I don’t play anymore.” 

“But you _should_. You’re a musician, Julie. It’s _part of you_.” 

Julie crossed her arms. “We just met, you hardly know me.” 

“And I already know enough to know that.” Julie could feel her resolve weakening slightly and she cursed the fact that Luke was somehow able to pick up on the same similarities she had. 

She pulled her gaze away from those pleading eyes and looked past Luke at the floor behind him. She shifted her weight on her feet awkwardly. “Look, it's been awhile— I haven't—” 

Luke cut her off again and she was actually kind of okay with that because she wasn’t really sure what she was trying to say. “You can just try the one song. That’s all I’m asking. If you can’t, or you hate it and want to stop, we’ll let you go, no questions asked, alright? But I think it could be really good. For all of us.” 

Julie still hadn’t worked out exactly what Luke’s deal was and why he cared about her and her music so much, but he was so disarmingly sincere about it that Julie surprised herself again. She heaved out a shaky breath, then looked back up at him. He was already looking right at her so they made direct eye contact when she said, “Yeah, alright, I’ll try.” The grin that overtook Luke’s face was blinding. Julie wondered what exactly she had gotten herself into. 

Julie stayed in bed for a while the next morning after turning her alarm off, just trying to psych herself up. _One song_ she reminded herself. That’s all it is. 

She was tense when she finally made her way out to the studio, and got tenser still when she put her hands on the handles to open the doors. She could hear the muffled sounds of the boys playing and messing around already on the other side of the doors. _One song_. 

“Julie!” Luke leapt to his feet from where he was sitting on the couch as soon as the doors opened. He sounded surprised. 

“I said I would come,” she said, keeping her tone as light as possible, but she was distracted. She looked around the studio in disbelief. It was exactly the same as it had been when she sang earlier in the week, and the same as it had been every day for the past year. It’s exactly what she was expecting it to look like when she was bracing herself for the dark cloud to surround her like usual, but it never did. The sunlight was peeking in through the windows and Reggie and Alex were still messing with their instruments and Julie was breathing as easily as she could before she walked in. 

“Julie?” Luke asked hesitantly, bringing Julie back to earth, and she shook herself out of it. 

“I’m good,” she said and nodded reassuringly at Luke before making her way over to the piano. And she was good. Better, even. “Let’s do this.” 

Julie found herself stopping by the studio more and more often after that. Sometimes she would stop by just to listen, sometimes she had something of her own to work on, sometimes Luke had something he wanted her to try or wanted her opinion on. Julie brought out a watering can for some of the plants in the studio. If she was going to be spending more time out there she might as well try and keep the place nice. 

Julie was very out of practice and while playing the piano turned out to be like riding a bike, getting back into the swing of songwriting was a bit more difficult. She told this to Luke the first time he asked for her opinion but he just said “Hey, gotta start somewhere,” and shrugged in that easy way he did before sliding in next to her at the piano bench. 

Julie wasn’t expecting it to become a normal thing but soon enough she found herself in the studio with Luke every Saturday while Alex and Reggie were off doing who knows what.

Luke was so easy to write with even though it had been a while and it was shocking to Julie how easily the two of them clicked. How easy she clicked with the whole band, really. Just as Julie was spending more and more time in the studio, the rest of the band was spending more time in the house. Reggie in particular had taken a shine to both her dad and Carlos, who both seemed delighted by this for their own reasons. Reggie asked her dad about his camera equipment with genuine interest one time and he was sold forever. Carlos just thought all the guys were cool, and he had decided based on unspecified criteria that Reggie was the coolest. Julie once overheard Alex telling Carlos “Just cause he wears a leather jacket all the time doesn’t make him the coolest,” but Carlos was not swayed. 

On Flynn’s insistence, Julie brought her out to finally meet the boys. “They live in your garage, Julie. I’m important enough to know anyone who lives in your garage.”

“They don’t _live_ in the garage.”

Flynn shrugged. “They might as well. Anyways, you don’t get to hide the cute boys from me anymore. Totally not best friend behaviour.”

Julie laughed. “Well, they’re probably out there right now if you want to go see.”

Luke and Reggie were leaning over Luke’s notebook and Alex was humming and watering the plants behind the piano when Julie and Flynn walked in. Luke’s head shot up as soon as the studio doors opened. “Julie, hey! We were just working on something I wanted to show… Oh, hi.”

“Flynn, this is Luke, Reggie, and Alex.” Reggie threw up a peace sign and Alex put down the watering can to offer a little wave. “Boys, this is Flynn.” 

Flynn was glancing around the studio. It had been a while since she had been in there, to. “You’re right,” she said, putting a hand on Julie’s arm. “It does feel brighter in here.” Julie smiled, knowing how much work they had all put in, accidentally and on purpose, to bring the studio back to life. “But hey, what were you going to show Julie, Luke?”

Luke hesitated, closing his notebook. “That’s alright, I can show her later.”

Flynn plunked herself down on the couch and made herself comfortable. “By all means, pretend I’m not here. I’ll just enjoy the show.” 

Flynn took being introduced to the band as an invitation to hang around whenever she wanted (which it was, actually), which is how she ended up in the studio the first time Alex’s boyfriend came by.

They had been expecting the boys at any minute for rehearsal so neither Julie nor Flynn reacted when they heard the studio doors open. That is, until they saw who had opened the door. The stranger was not the boys, as expected, but he was absolutely gorgeous. 

Flynn turned to Julie in disbelief. “ _Who_ is _that_?” 

Julie didn’t recognize the newcomer but she had a pretty good idea of who it might be. She jumped off the couch to introduce herself. “You must be the famous Willie. The boys are running late but please come in.” 

Willie was insanely cool. Not that Julie had questioned Alex’s taste in the first place, but. She approved. Flynn also clearly approved. 

The boys showed up a few minutes later. “Sorry we’re late! Oh, hey Willie.” 

“Hey Reg, Luke.” Willie gave Reggie a fist bump and nodded at Luke who was making his way over to Julie. 

Luke jokingly rolled his eyes as Alex gave Willie a quick kiss. “The two of them are sickening, honestly.”

Julie hit his shoulder. “Come on, they’re adorable.”

Luke softened. “They are. Willie’s good for him.” 

Just like that, Willie and Flynn became members of the ever increasing cast of characters that was constantly in and out of the studio. Carlos spent more time there than he probably ever had before, and their dad loved the band and loved sitting in on their rehearsals. Julie didn’t realize how much she needed something like this until she had it. 

The real joy in making music was other people. It took meeting the boys to remind her of that, filling her world with colour and movement and light every time they all picked up their instruments. Julie had thought that part of her was gone completely but she knew now that it never left.

“I knew all along” Luke said proudly and Julie gave him an unimpressed look, but he wasn’t actually wrong. He was the one who was insistent from the very beginning and Julie was so confused by it at the time but maybe he did see what little was left of it in her. Maybe, despite what Julie had convinced herself, the music had still been coming out of her without her even needing to try. 

Making music had been so empty for so long because Julie was doing it _alone_. Luke and the band would never replace her mother, that was impossible. But they didn’t need to. Getting to build that connection with them, getting to share that passion, that was the most special thing she could do. 

Julie was humming. She was walking through the house and she was humming and she didn’t even notice until she saw the weird face her dad was making at her from the kitchen table. She stopped, suddenly conscious of her behaviour. “Why is your face doing that?” 

He didn’t answer, he just got up and tried to squeeze the life out of her. “My little _niña_ ’s back.” He said when he let go of her and he was looking a little misty. 

“Dad, I never went anywhere. I’ve always been here.” Julie protested, but she knew what he meant. 

Julie’s life had changed immeasurably in the short amount of time since the boys showed up in their yard. She still struggled to wrap her head around everything sometimes. There was a lot about the whole situation that she didn’t really understand.

Julie couldn’t help but laugh at the way Reggie and Luke lit up every time her dad complemented their music. They were totally unphased by Alex’s insistence that parents didn’t count. 

“I just think he’s a cool guy,” Reggie shrugged, suddenly evasive. Julie was reminded just how much she didn’t know about their families. It was a clearly touchy subject for everyone and Julie tried hard to respect that because she knew what it was like but she couldn’t help the curiosity that overcame her every time one of them dodged what could have been easy conversation.

The three of them seemed to operate as a unit, independent of anything else, and it was honestly quite sweet the way they all took care of each other but somewhere deep down it worried Julie. She had a feeling that when she heard the full story she wouldn’t love the answer. 

It wasn’t much of a surprise to Julie when she finally received a formal invitation to join the band. She had not missed how all of her and Luke’s songs included piano or harmonies for him and someone with a suspiciously familiar range. Frankly, they kind of needed Julie in order to perform any of it at this point. Still, she happily accepted their offer under one condition. “Are we changing the name?” She asked. 

The boys all looked between each other in surprise. “I- if you want to?” Luke offered.

Julie nodded with certainty. “I don’t just want to be Bobby’s replacement.” Luke shook his head quickly.

“Of course not,” Alex said.

“You’re better.” Luke added resolutely. 

“So, new band, new sound, new name. It’ll be like a fresh start for all of us.”

The boys conferred with each other quickly through a series of facial expressions, which was honestly kind of impressive, before turning back to Julie. “Whatever you say, boss” Luke said with a cheeky grin. “Did you have anything particular in mind?”

Reggie raised a finger and opened his mouth.

“General reminder that we do not make country music.” Luke said before Reggie got a chance to speak. Reggie closed his mouth and lowered his hand. 

“I didn’t have anything in particular in mind. I’ll ask Flynn later, she always has good ideas.”

“So does that mean you’re in?” Luke asked, bouncing on his toes a little.

Julie smiled and nodded. “I’m in.”

“Well, in that case welcome to the band, name TBA.”

“Can we do a band hug now?” Reggie asked. It seemed like as good a place to start as any. 

Julie’s dad scooped her up in a bone crushing hug when she shared the news with him. He celebrated like they were at one of Carlos’s baseball games and he had just made the winning play.

“They should all come over for dinner, we should celebrate! Flynn’s invited too, of course.”

Julie smiled. Flynn had appointed herself band manager as soon as Julie told her. “I think they would like that.”

He looked out at the kitchen briefly. “I don’t think we have enough space for everyone at the table though, we’ll probably have to eat in front of the TV. I hope that’s okay.” 

Julie laughed. “I don’t think the boys are much for formality, I’m sure they won’t mind.” 

They did not mind, unsurprisingly. “Sweet,” Luke said. “Alex’s parents hardly even let us sit on their couch, let alone eat on it.” 

“Yeah, and whose fault is that?” Alex looked over at Julie in exasperation. “I left them alone for five minutes one time. One time! And they spilled dip all over the place.” 

Julie shook her head but she couldn’t help but smile. “Well, I guess we’ll just have to keep an eye on them then.” 

It was a little bit chaotic having seven people around for dinner, but no one minded. It was honestly pretty nice. Even Julie’s dad was alright with the fact that his house had gotten a lot busier over the past few weeks. 

He just laughed. “I’m not used to having this many people in the house. Things keep moving, appearing, disappearing without me noticing. There’s always music coming from somewhere whether I can see you guys or not. It’s like you’ve brought a band of ghosts with you. _Julie and the Phantoms_.”

“Julie and the Phantoms,” Reggie repeated, then grinned. “I like the sound of that.”

Julie had to admit that she liked the sound of that too and she looked over at Flynn for approval, but Flynn was already doing something on her phone. "Username was not taken on insta" she announced before typing quickly again. "It's ours now." Julie looked up at the boys who nodded in acceptance and just like that they had a band name. 

Julie raised her water glass in a toast. “To new beginnings,” she said, and everyone raised their glasses and repeated after her.

“To new beginnings!”

Sometimes things were just that easy.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luke was constantly in awe of Julie, but performing with her on stage in front of a crowd full of people was an entirely otherworldly experience. He had tricky feelings about fate but there was no doubt in his mind that the universe brought them together because the two of them were meant to perform with each other. He always knew that there was something special about her with the way they had that psychic connection right from the start, but she _got_ him. He didn’t think there was anyone who would ever be able to understand him as simply and easily as she did.

If anyone had told Luke a month ago how well things were actually turning out he probably would have been skeptical at the very least (Not fully disbelieving, of course. He always believed that they were destined for greatness and if the universe offered a little help, well. Destiny). 

Reggie was playing video games with Carlos after they had all stayed over for dinner like he often did, despite always getting his butt kicked by a kid. He told them repeatedly that one day all of the practice was going to pay off and he was finally going to win. Luke had his doubts but he wasn’t going to stop Reggie from having his fun. Alex was perched on the arm of the couch commentating (which was mostly just making fun of Reggie). Luke was pretty sure Alex was still trying to earn cool points with Carlos. 

Luke and Julie were showing Ray some of the new songs they had been working on at his request, their notebooks open on the kitchen table. Luke didn’t think that Ray actually knew much about songwriting, but that didn’t stop him from offering his enthusiastic approval for basically everything they showed him. 

“I’m so excited for you guys, really. This is awesome.” 

“Thanks, _Papa_ ” Julie said, and she and her dad did that little thing they did with their fingers before Ray got up from his chair. Something a little more sour than Luke wanted to admit twisted in his stomach. He tried his best to brush it off. 

“Alright, well, I probably need to send your brother to bed. I don’t think I’m supposed to let him stay up all night playing video games.”

Reggie excitedly chattered Luke’s ear off as they made their way back to his place, but Luke was only half listening. They had all so easily made themselves at home with the Molinas, and the whole family had brought them into the fold and been so supportive, no questions asked. Luke wasn’t used to being trusted so easily by adults (his mother had informed him that he “looked like a rascal”) but Ray hadn’t even hesitated. 

Ray was kind of the best dad of all time, as far as Luke could tell. Julie seemed to think so too and it was almost a little weird for Luke. It wasn't something he was super used to hearing about. 

Reggie’s house was dark when they turned onto his street. Reggie’s face fell only slightly. “Looks like we’re alone tonight.” 

The sour feeling from earlier twisted in Luke’s gut again.

Reggie decided that it was a good night for a bath which was kind of a tell but it also gave Luke enough time to do something impulsive without Reggie noticing. He grabbed a sweatshirt that probably wasn’t even his from the floor and climbed out Reggie’s window like he had been doing whenever he wanted to clear his head at a weird hour. He hopped on his bike and began a familiar route through the neighbourhood. He pulled to a stop and left his bike near some trees a block away from his destination. His heart was racing as fast as it ever had as he crept into the yard, doing his best to stay hidden by the bushes. He knew the neighbours to the left were often the ones to call and say they had seen him sneaking out, so he knew to stay far away from where they might see him. 

Luke didn't like feeling so off kilter. The house looked weird from this angle, his view partially obscured by the bush he was hiding behind. He was expecting to feel more… well, he wasn't really sure what he was expecting to feel. But it wasn't this, creeping in like an outsider to a life that didn't belong to him anymore. It was unsettling.

The house looked exactly like it had when he left. He wondered if his window was still unlocked like he always left it. He wondered if his parents even went into his room again after, or if they just closed the door and pretended it wasn’t there. 

Seeing his parents’ faces again for the first time in months stung a little bit. They were in the living room watching TV. His mom was knitting like usual. Anyone else who saw this little snapshot of their life probably wouldn’t have been able to guess what had happened. They seemed to be doing fine. Luke blinked hard, tried to pretend for his own sake that he didn’t notice his eyes watering. 

The doorbell was so close, but so far. All he had to do was cross the lawn. He almost did it. He wanted to so badly, more than he thought he did when he was on the way there.

He looked through the window again. They weren’t fighting. No one was yelling. They probably would have been, if he was there. 

The neighbour’s porch light flickered on dimly. Luke realized with a start that he had been slowly creeping forwards out of his hiding spot as if he had forgotten where he was and what he was doing. 

He quickly crept out of the shadows and back up the block. He rode his bike back to Reggie’s and snuck back in quietly, laying down on the floor to catch his breath. If he had meant for that little adventure to clear his head, he was sorely mistaken. Instead it seemed to invite to the surface feelings that he had been doing his best to squish down.

Regret was, at this point, a useless feeling. Unfortunately, Luke knew from experience that uselessness rarely precluded feelings from being felt, and the useless ones were often the hardest to ignore. 

Going back was a mistake. He had made his choice months ago. Dwelling would only invite nagging, useless feelings. He had to move on. He had to make it worth it. 

Luke was barely awake in the studio the next morning when Flynn busted the doors open and placed a tray of coffees on the table. “Look alive, people. Band meeting!”

Luke was, frankly, slightly intimidated by Flynn at first. He rarely met anyone who matched his confidence and self assuredness, and it kind of made him wonder if other people found him just as disarming. He decided very quickly that she was actually kind of the best, and Luke was smart enough to know that a person like her was a good person to have on your side. Sunset Curve, while determined, lacked an element of strategic organization. They tended to make moves by pure brute force and the thought of combining that with Flynn’s remarkable efficiency made Luke kind of giddy. This could be really, really good. 

“There’s a new artist showcase on Friday and I got your names on the list so if you have plans, cancel them.”

Case in point. 

Alex was the only one with plans. Luke looked over at him and he shrugged. “I’ll just invite Willie.” 

Flynn nodded in satisfaction. “Great. Then you guys are going to figure out what you’re going to perform and start rehearsing, and tomorrow you’re going to bring me some clothes so I can make sure you all look good on stage.”

“I always look good,” Reggie said proudly. Alex patted his shoulder. 

"What's wrong with what we usually wear?" Luke asked defensively. He thought they were cool, thank you very much.

Flynn shrugged. “A little polish wouldn’t kill you guys. I’ll be back tomorrow at noon! Don’t forget!”

She swept out of the studio as suddenly as she had entered. 

“Dang,” Reggie said. “She means business.”

Julie grinned. “Yeah, she does.”

They threw themselves into rehearsing. He understood why Flynn meant business, after all. This was their first gig as Julie and the Phantoms, if they had a misstep here it could seriously set them back. Luke had faith in them though, and most importantly he had faith in Julie. While Sunset Curve had probably played in front of some of those people before, this would be Julie’s debut. Her voice blew him away every time even though he knew it was coming. That audience had no idea what was going to hit them. Luke got excited just thinking about it. 

Luke went over to Julie and bumped his shoulder into hers after they finished rehearsing for the day, everyone wiping sweat off their brows. “First real gig on Friday, how’re you feeling?” 

Julie looked tired, but pleased. “I feel fine, honestly. I would have been more nervous if I had to do it alone, but knowing I’ll have you all behind me…” she shrugged, “Honestly, I’m just excited.” 

Friday couldn’t come soon enough, as far as Luke was concerned. The rush of performing was his favourite thing in the world and it had been a while. Plus, he and Julie finally got the chance to show off some of the music they had been working on together and Luke thought it was some of his best work. 

Before they could make it to Friday though, they had to make it through Flynn’s whirlwind week of band management activities. 

When Luke, Reggie and Alex all got to the studio the next day (right at noon, not even late) Flynn was already there and she was huddled over a notebook with Willie of all people. Luke absently wondered if that was what he and Julie looked like when they were deep in a songwriting session. Alex looked at Luke with raised eyebrows. “That seems dangerous. Should I be concerned?”

“Of course not,” Flynn said charmingly. “Willie was just helping me work out how to get the designs changed on your drums.”

“I know a guy.” Willie said easily. 

Alex slid under Willie’s outstretched arm. “Of course you do.” Willie dropped a kiss on his forehead. 

“Alright, enough being adorable, it's not on the schedule. Next order of business: Bring me the clothes!” 

They all dutifully brought their bags of clothes to Flynn and Flynn chose to examine Luke’s offerings first. Julie flopped onto the couch with a grin. "This should be fun." 

Flynn dug through the bag a bit and then looked up at Luke with judgement in her eyes. She raised an eyebrow. “Did you bring me anything with sleeves?” She dug around once more. “Oh! Look at that, I found _one_ ,” she said, pulling out a blue zip up by the hood. 

Luke made eye contact with Julie and they both tried to stifle the giggles as Flynn triumphantly held it up only to notice that the sleeves had been cut off. She dropped it back into the bag in defeat. “What’s even the point of a sleeveless sweatshirt? You know what, fine. At least you already have a strong brand.” Luke mentally fist pumped. So he liked to let his arms breathe, sue him. 

Flynn turned her gaze towards Alex next. “Alright, show me what you brought, drummer boy.”

She did manage to come up with outfits for all of them that she at least deemed satisfactory. “I mostly just want to make sure your looks all complement Julie’s” she said. “Julie’s the important one.”

Luke wondered if he should be offended as the former lead singer of the band, but mostly he just agreed. 

Friday arrived pretty quickly after that and soon enough the whole band was piling into Ray’s car wearing their Flynn approved outfits. Alex was the tallest so he argued his way into the front seat, leaving Reggie, Julie and Luke squished together in the back. The radio was on, providing a constant stream of background noise as Ray, Reggie and Alex all chattered away. 

Luke toyed with a piece of fringe from Julie’s vest. “I like this, it’s cool.” he said quietly. Julie was always great but he had never seen her all dressed up for a performance before and she looked like a rock star. 

Julie smiled gently back. “Thanks, it was my mom’s.”

Luke panicked briefly. He was never good with the emotions. He grabbed her hand and squeezed it gently before dropping it. “She’d be proud of you, you’re gonna rock it.”

Julie took a steady breath and then looked up at Luke, making eye contact. “Yeah, we are.”

They totally rocked it. 

Luke was constantly in awe of Julie, but performing with her on stage in front of a crowd full of people was an entirely otherworldly experience. He had tricky feelings about fate but there was no doubt in his mind that the universe brought them together because the two of them were meant to perform with each other. He always knew that there was something special about her with the way they had that psychic connection right from the start, but she _got_ him. He didn’t think there was anyone who would ever be able to understand him as simply and easily as she did.

He was bouncing around on his toes backstage, just as amped up as he was while they were performing. “Guys, that was awesome. Everyone was _loving_ us. You’re gonna be a star, Jules.” Alex and Reggie nodded in agreement, obviously. How could they not?

Julie was absolutely radiant. Luke couldn’t blame himself for not being able to take his eyes off of her while they were singing together. He wasn’t sure how anyone was able to look away. 

She pulled all of them into a band hug and they bounced excitedly in a circle, only tripping a little over each other's feet. When they all released Julie asked, “So when do we get to do that again?”

That was when Flynn appeared. “Luckily for you, I might have gotten your name out to some interested people. Does Eats and Beats ring a bell for any of you?” 

Eats and Beats did in fact ring a bell, considering a _ton_ of industry people went there to scout. They had a much more difficult list to get onto than the average showcase night because everyone knew you could kickstart your career there if you impressed the right people. Luke’s eyes widened and when he looked at the rest of the band they were making similar faces. 

“How did you get us on that list already?” Alex asked in disbelief. 

“I’ve been schmoozing,” Flynn said proudly. “Besides, people were really impressed by you guys. I gave out our socials to like, a ton of people. We’ve already gained a bunch of followers.”

Julie wrapped an arm around Flynn’s shoulder. “You’re the best manager ever.”

Flynn shrugged, unphased. “I know. Now come on, let me take a picture for Instagram. We’ve got new followers to please.” 

The energy was high as they all made their way back to Julie’s after the gig. The volume was cranked on the radio as they all sang along raucously to whatever it threw at them. They were still laughing and dancing along as they piled into the house together. 

Ray interrupted when they started to quiet down a little. “You guys have to be starving. How about I order all of us some pizza to celebrate the first successful Julie and the Phantoms gig?” 

Reggie gasped. “You would do that?” Luke and Alex made eye contact and Alex shook his head fondly. 

Ray just clapped a hand on his shoulder. “Of course! What better way to celebrate?”

“Sorry Julie, your dad is my new favourite Molina.”

Julie grinned. “I guess I can understand that.”

They all went out to the studio to get their stuff put away and when they got back into the house they were expecting to eat in front of the TV again (which, honestly, was just another example of how cool Ray was as a dad in Luke’s opinion) but when they got to the kitchen there was a card table pushed up against the kitchen table. “What’s all this?” Julie asked her dad, looking equally surprised at the change in layout. 

“I figured we could do a real family dinner tonight,” he shrugged, “unfortunately we only have so many proper chairs but I did my best.” 

Luke hadn’t noticed the somewhat haphazard collection until Ray mentioned it but he looked over at the tables again and noticed the folding chair, the lawn chair, and the office chair that had been set up along with the normal furniture. Luke was honestly kind of charmed by the mishmash and Alex looked touched as well. Reggie for his part was downright delighted and he shared a look with Luke before they both, in almost perfect unison, yelled, “Dibs on the lawn chair!” Luke was pretty pleased with himself for winning their mad scramble and it seemed to be everyone else’s cue to settle in around the table. Even with the extra people squeezed in there was still an unspoken agreement that the good chair at what was now the head of the table remained unfilled. 

Alex shook his head at the two of them as he was sitting down, mumbling something about “can’t bring them anywhere.” 

It was one of Luke’s favourite nights in a while. Good music and great company were hard to argue with. So was pizza. Hard to get much better than that. 

Luke was more inspired than ever. Sometimes when things were going good the music flowed so easily it was almost harder to stop writing. Writing music with Julie was almost always like that. When they wrote songs together they just had such an easy connection that made it so easy to open up to each other, but the more Julie opened up to Luke the guiltier he felt.

They hadn’t written at all in the week leading up to their first performance because they had been too busy making sure they had everything else in order, but they always wrote together on Saturdays and the following morning was no exception. Luke had his notebook full of little bits and thoughts that had come to him over the week and Julie had clearly done the same thing based on the papers she had spread around waiting for him when he arrived. She unfolded a poem titled “Flying Solo.” 

“I think these could make good lyrics, but I could use your help coming up with a melody. It’s about Flynn. She helped me a lot over the past year with my mom stuff. I don’t know what I would have done without her.”

“I love it,” Luke said and smiled, but while the two of them started trying to work on a melody he felt a bit of guilt creep into his chest. It wasn’t the first time that working with Julie had made him feel this way. His mom was still alive. He missed her and his dad all the time and they were still alive and every day he chose not to talk to them. 

They did come up with a killer melody, of course. It was going to sound great once they had the whole band around, and Flynn would be endlessly pleased to know that such a great song had been written about her. It still ate at Luke. 

He didn’t like keeping secrets from anyone, least of all Julie, but he didn’t really know how to be honest with her about this one. He could tell that she knew something was up but she wasn’t being pushy about it, probably out of the kindness of her own heart. That made Luke feel worse. If he could sit in front of her and honestly tell her “my parents were terrible people and I hated them and I never want to see them again,” that would be one thing. She’d probably even be understanding. He’d seen the look on her face when Alex casually told her about the situation with his own parents. 

He wasn’t sure how “I can’t stand them but I also love them and miss them so much but I made my choice and now I can’t go back even though I kind of regret it,” would go over. 

He had one song mostly written but he had ripped the page out of his notebook, something he hardly ever did. He wasn’t ready for Julie to see it yet. He wasn’t sure when he would be. 

Getting back to Reggie’s place wasn’t much of a comfort. Both of his parents were actually home, Luke noted by the cars in the driveway. This was always the sort of thing that made Reggie an optimist and left Luke and Alex to deal with the fallout. Luke dutifully snuck in through the window. He was eventually able to fall into an uneasy sleep, but he knew all of his problems would be far from solved in the morning. 

The volume in Reggie’s house was increasing. “It hasn’t been this bad in a while,” Reggie said calmly, but he flinched when there was a crashing sound. Luke clapped him on the shoulder as casually as possible. “We might as well head over to Julie’s a bit early then, yeah?” Reggie nodded but glanced apprehensively at the door. Luke hated basically everything about the situation but the rebellious part of him always enjoyed the thrill of sneaking out a bedroom window. 

Julie yawned for what must’ve been the thousandth time in the past half hour and Luke felt guilty for keeping her up so late, but Luke had felt Reggie’s mood dampening the later it got before he dozed off on Luke’s shoulder with his bass in his lap. If Reggie’s mask of positivity was slipping enough that both Luke and Alex were able to notice so clearly, he had to be even more upset than he was letting on. He knew that they would have to head back to Reggie’s as soon as they told Julie to go up to bed and he was trying to put that off for as long as possible. 

Unfortunately, Julie chose that moment to stand up and stretch. “Sorry guys,” she said. “It might be time for me to turn in. I’m exhausted and I have plans with Flynn tomorrow morning.” 

Luke looked quickly at Reggie who was still sleeping before making nervous eye contact with Alex, hoping he could think of another way to stall. Julie had followed Luke’s gaze, and when he looked back up at her she pinned him with a calculating look. “I really should head inside but if you, you know, have some lyrics or something you still want to work on,” she said slowly, “the couch does pull out. You know, in case you accidentally stay too late.” 

Luke’s own sigh of relief was probably just as obvious as the way Alex dropped the tension in his shoulders. He could not have been more grateful for his and Julie’s psychic connection than he was in that moment. She nodded confidently after that and made her way out of the studio, turning back just before closing the door. “Night, guys,” she said gently, then glanced over at Luke one last time and Luke knew by the look on her face that she would have questions for him in the morning so he didn’t hesitate to smile softly at her in acknowledgement. 

“Thank you,” he said quietly, not wanting to wake Reggie, and then watched as the doors shut gently behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the delay on this one! I'm realizing now that I set myself up to writing and posting this during exam season, which was maybe not my brightest move. Anyways, last two chapters shouldn't take as long and they're my favourites so stay tuned!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julie didn’t like the feeling that was bubbling up inside her. She squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her fists. “No, it’s not,” she gritted out. When she opened her eyes Luke was fiddling with the chain he always wore on his pants. He was looking away. Julie stood up. “I think I’m going to head inside.” She glanced at Luke who looked dejected but not surprised. “I’m sorry, you can stay here tonight if you want to but I—I need to go.” And then she left.

Julie had brunch plans with Flynn but she stopped by the studio on her way out to see if the boys were still there. She opened the doors quietly and was met by the sight of Reggie drooling on Luke’s chest where they were slumped over together on the couch. Julie was pretty sure she told them that the couch folded out, but whatever. As long as they were happy.

Julie could tell that there was something up with them and she was dying to get it out of Luke, but she didn’t have time before meeting up with Flynn and she didn’t want to wake them. She would ask later, whenever she got a chance. 

Most of the week passed without Julie getting anywhere close to having a chance. The boys were pretty much joined at the hip and she had a feeling it would be an easier conversation to have in private, so she did her best to put it out of her mind. 

Band rehearsals were going smoothly as they could have hoped, and there was a new fire ignited in all of them with the news of the Eats and Beats gig. If Julie had even half a mind to be nervous about it, all of that had been wiped away after one rehearsal. It felt like the band was part of something bigger than any of them, and that it was getting better with every day they spent together. There was no way anything would go wrong. 

“If you guys perform like that next Friday,” Alex said at the end of one day, wiping sweaty hair out of his eyes, “managers will have no choice but to talk to us.” 

Reggie nodded emphatically. “Seriously, you guys ooze chemistry.” 

Julie didn’t get to see how Luke reacted to that statement as she ducked her head and blushed, but Alex cut in with a quick elbow to Reggie’s side before either of them had a chance to respond. “You should never say ooze again.”

The thing was, Julie kind of didn’t disagree with him. Either of them, actually. Ooze was kind of a gross word. But she felt the way she clicked with Luke as a performer the first time they sang together, and she knew that it was another level when they finally got the chance to perform on stage in front of a crowd. She felt like they were born to sing together, like there was a greater force at work that made Luke wander his way into their driveway and ask to use the studio that day. It was still a weird thing to acknowledge at face value, like it was too big and too powerful to look directly at. 

Sometimes it felt like that. Sometimes, there was a teenage boy sitting at her piano bench and begging her to hang out with him ‘cause his boys were busy and he would simply wither away if left alone for too long. 

“I can’t,” she sighed. “I promised Carlos I would go to his baseball game.” 

Luke sighed and sulked over to the couch. Julie couldn’t help but laugh at him and the way he was pouting. “I guess I’ll just spend tonight by myself, left alone with my own thoughts.” He sat up very straight and looked at Julie with an air of seriousness that was clearly being put on. “Do you know how dangerous it is to leave me alone with my own thoughts? Alex is gonna be mad at you when he comes back and sees that I’ve done something stupid.” 

“Oh, stop being such a drama queen,” she said, purposefully trying to rile him up for her own amusement. 

“A drama queen? _Me_?” he said, quite dramatically. The pout was back. Julie gave him a pointed look. 

“You can come to the game with us if you want,” She offered. She didn’t want to admit that the pout was actually kind of effective, but she did feel kind of bad leaving him alone on a night where both Alex and Reggie inexplicably had other plans. 

“Really?” He sounded surprised and his face lit up. 

Julie wasn’t sure exactly what it was about little league baseball that warranted that reaction, but she nodded. “Of course, Carlos will be happy to know he’s got another fan.”

Luke took that as both an invitation and an assignment. The Los Feliz little league did not know what it was getting with sudden new superfan Luke Patterson. He made it a goal to be the loudest cheerer every time Carlos came up to bat. There was little competition considering their dad was focused on taking pictures and Julie was burying her head into her hands to laugh every time Luke started.

Julie elbowed Luke in the side after he finished. “Oh my god, I think the entire state could hear you on that one.”

“Good,” Luke nodded and elbowed her back. “It’s ‘cause I have pipes.”

Even though the bleachers were half empty they were still sitting squished up against each other. Julie wasn’t sure who’s fault it was originally but every time a gentle breeze came drifting through Luke would find a way to get even closer. It was hardly chilly, just a typical summer night in southern California, but Julie wasn’t complaining. 

Carlos’s face lit up more at seeing Luke there than it had for Julie. “Wow,” she said, looking up at her dad. “No love for family members, huh?” 

He patted her on the shoulder. “Dads and older sisters just aren’t as cool as teenage band members.” 

Julie pretended to pout. “I _am_ a teenage band member.”

Luke, for his part, was absolutely laying on the superfan behaviour, jumping on the chance to high five Carlos and congratulate him on his good game. This was the first time Julie had ever seen Luke with kids and she couldn’t help but smile. If this was his first time playing the role of big brother he was doing it well. Of course, it occurred to her that she had no idea if Luke actually had any siblings. He had never mentioned any and Julie had never asked. 

It was a nice night, the sun only just beginning to set as they all piled back into the car to head back home. Carlos took the front seat, claiming that his victory deserved a reward. Julie would usually put up more of a fight but she was feeling generous. She was writing lyrics in her head without even thinking about it, a habit indicative of a good day. Luke reached over to poke her thigh. 

“You look deep in thought.” He said. “What’s going on up there?”

“Just happy,” Julie said.

Luke grinned. “Me too.”

When Julie got home that evening she flopped over onto her bed and hugged a pillow to her chest and tried as hard as she could not to be a cliché teenage girl. 

Julie hadn’t missed the way that Luke tended to hover near her like he always wanted to be as close to her as possible, the way he would always let his fingertips brush over hers when they wrote music, and he probably wasn’t doing it on purpose so Julie was trying not to read into it but—

Flynn dismissed that logic immediately when Julie brought it up to her. “Whether he’s doing it on purpose or on accident, it's certainly not something he does with _me_.”

Julie had to admit that Flynn had a point there. Julie also had to admit that she was not so innocent in her own right, which was something that had become especially apparent to her after having this conversation with Flynn. She couldn’t make herself stop though, not when it was so tempting, and she wasn't really sure that Luke would want her to stop. She didn’t think that she wanted to stop herself either. 

Anyways, Flynn said they were the most watchable duetters she had ever seen, and in that sense letting whatever this was simmer between them was probably not the worst idea. They had an important gig coming up.

Flynn had dropped by their rehearsal in the afternoon to hear their new song for the first time because it was the one they were planning on playing at Eats and Beats (if everyone they showed it to liked it, that is. They had already gotten an emphatic two thumbs up from Julie’s dad but Julie was taking that opinion with a grain of salt). Flynn loved it. 

Willie stopped by after Flynn had left and he loved it too. Julie didn’t like to think of herself as particularly big headed but she had to admit that the compliments getting heaped on her were inflating her ego just a little bit. She had that feeling thrumming under her skin again, that one that told her they had something really special here. She looked over at Luke and the look he gave back at her suggested he was feeling it too. 

He threw an arm around her, pulling her closer into his side and announcing, “You’re a star, Julie Molina.”

Julie felt herself blushing so she laughed and pushed him off as they all made their way into the house. “Ugh,” she said in what was probably not her most convincing effort. “You’re all sweaty.”

Everyone was hanging out in the living room when Julie’s dad got home from work. “Hey Julie, boys,” he said without batting an eye. He was almost to the kitchen when he paused suddenly and took a few backward steps to look back at the group with his brows furrowed. “There’s an extra,” he said generally before looking directly at Julie. “There is an extra, right? I swear there were only three last time I counted.” 

Julie laughed. “Yes, dad, don’t worry. This is Willie, you haven’t met him yet.”

He nodded. “Willie, alright, that makes me feel better. What brings you here, Willie? New band member? Groupie?”

Julie looked over at Alex and did her best to express through her face that it was up to him how much he wanted to say. Alex nodded calmly, and he never wavered as he looked up at Ray. Luke and Reggie were looking at him with their own proud little smiles too when Alex said, “He’s, uh, actually my boyfriend.” 

Alex only had the chance to fidget for half a second before Ray smiled and nodded. “Well it’s lovely to meet you then. Willie, right? I should probably remember your name if I’m going to be seeing more of you around here.”

Alex wasted no time pretending it was no big deal, very calmly saying “Anyways,” to restart the conversation as soon as Julie’s dad left the room. Still, Julie didn’t miss the way he was smiling for the rest of the night. 

Willie grabbed Julie’s wrist as everyone was making their way out. “Hey, thank you. You have no idea how much that means to him. To us.” 

Julie gave him a small shrug. “It was nothing. That’s what we do here, for family.” 

Julie wanted to pass on the message anyways, so she made her way to the kitchen and wrapped her dad up in a hug. 

“Of course, _mija_ , he’s family.”

Julie smiled. “I know, that’s what I said. But his own parents…”

Her dad frowned. “Well in case I didn’t make it clear enough earlier, please make sure they know that they’re welcome here anytime.” 

Julie was reminded again just how much she didn’t know about their families. It was a clearly touchy subject for everyone and Julie tried hard to respect that because she knew what it was like but she couldn’t help the curiosity that overcame her every time one of them dodged what could have been easy conversation.

Julie hadn’t found a good moment to ask, but she hadn’t forgotten the weirdness with Luke and Reggie crashing in the studio the other night. She felt a little guilty about ambushing Luke at a songwriting session but she hadn't gotten a chance to ask all week and by the time Saturday rolled around it was eating at her.

There was a quiet moment from both of them, a chance that Julie resignedly knew she had to take. Luke was tapping out a rhythm on his thigh with his pen and looking out the window. 

“So…” She started awkwardly and Luke looked up with a start, abandoning whatever thread of a song he was working on. “Can I ask you something?”

Luke cringed a little as if he was expecting this. “I’m guessing you’re gonna ask why Reggie and I stayed over the other night.”

Okay, so he actually was expecting this. Julie must have looked surprised cause Luke smiled just a little and said, “I was surprised when you didn’t ask me about it that morning.”

Julie nodded and Luke looked away, toying with the pen he had placed back on the piano. “You don’t have to tell me if you really don’t want to,” She added hesitantly, realizing that he was uncomfortable and not wanting to be pushy.

Luke just shook his head. “No, no, you’re so open with me _and_ you let us stay here without even asking. I always meant to tell you anyways.”

Julie hesitated before reaching out tentatively to grab his hand, squeezing it in a way that she hoped he would find encouraging. Luke squeezed back, but he dropped it before starting.

“Reggie’s folks are…” Luke heaved out a sigh and Julie was taken aback by the steely protectiveness on Luke’s usually smiling face. “They fight a lot. It was a bad one the other night and we could tell he didn’t want to go back home. This stuff gets to him more than he likes to let on.” 

Julie frowned and nodded. That did make a lot of sense, especially the more she thought about it, but… “And you?” Julie asked and Luke practically jumped. 

“What about me?”

“You were still here in the morning, too. Why couldn’t you guys go to your place?”

Luke was suddenly looking anywhere but back at Julie. “I’ve been staying at Reggie’s recently.” he said and Julie furrowed her brow, wondering why Luke was being so weird about this. Unless— 

“For how long?”

“Uh, basically all summer.”

Julie’s heart sank as her mind immediately jumped to the worst conclusion. “Luke, did your parents kick you out?” She was already working herself into a fit over it as Luke shrank in on himself more. What kind of parent kicks out their _own child_ , and especially their own child who was as good of a person as Luke?

“No,” he said, cutting into her building anger. “No, I uh, actually ran away.” 

Julie deflated instantly. “You what?” 

“We argued all the time and one day we all took it too far so I just. Left.” They sat in silence for a beat as Julie tried to process what she had just learned. Luke continued when it was clear Julie didn’t know what to say. “I think it was a mistake,” his voice cracked. “I… I really miss them.”

That kicked Julie’s brain back into gear. “Then go home and _talk to them_.”

Luke’s eyes were glassy. He shook his head. “I don’t think they want me back anymore. It’s too late.”

Julie didn’t like the feeling that was bubbling up inside her. She squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her fists. “No, it’s not,” she gritted out. When she opened her eyes Luke was fiddling with the chain he always wore on his pants. He was looking away. Julie stood up. “I think I’m going to head inside.” She glanced at Luke who looked dejected but not surprised. “I’m sorry, you can stay here tonight if you want to but I—I need to go.” And then she left. 

Julie felt like she was in a tough spot. She was in her bedroom scribbling aimlessly in a sketchbook. She would try to write, channel her feelings in a productive way, but it wouldn’t be the same alone in her room. It never was. 

She ripped out her page when it was full and continued scribbling on a new one. It was probably a good reminder, Julie tried to reason, that she didn’t know as much about the boys as she thought she did. It was really easy to forget that she hadn’t known them for her whole life. They just gelled, and maybe that was why it was so easy for her to let her guard down so easily. Maybe it was her fault for being too open. 

She hesitated on talking to Flynn about it. She wanted to talk it through with _someone_ , but. It was Luke’s secret. She might be mad at him but trust was trust. Julie texted Flynn to come over, but didn’t give any details. It would have to be enough for now. 

It just felt like it came out of left field. Luke _got_ her, understood her like he was reading her mind, and she didn’t know how to reconcile that with someone who so clearly did not understand her pain the way she thought he did. 

Flynn let herself in as Julie was tearing the second page out of her sketchbook. She sighed, dropping her backpack onto the floor and climbing up onto the bed. “Band trouble?”

Julie nodded dejectedly and did her best to explain things to Flynn without saying too much. Flynn wasn’t able to do much in the way of advice without knowing the specifics, of course. Julie was very much on her own with this one. But Flynn was able to give her a hug and sleep in her bed and tell her that everything would work itself out in the end. 

“I think I just need some time.” Julie said eventually, and that was the last that was said on the subject before they turned off the lights and went to sleep. 

She peeked into the studio in the morning to see if Luke had still taken her up on her offer. When she crept the door open he was sleeping soundly on the couch. He still hadn’t pulled it out, choosing instead to sleep on top of the cushions. 

At their next rehearsal Luke tried just once to initiate eye contact but when Julie quickly glanced away, uncomfortable, he made no move to try again. It kind of threw Julie, honestly. It was so unlike Luke not to care enough to put up a fight, especially not when they had something so important coming up, but apparently there was a whole new side of Luke that Julie had only just gotten to see.

Julie avoided Luke for a bit after that. It was hard to look him in the eyes. She felt a little betrayed. The band still practiced, they had an important gig coming up, but Julie tried to keep her distance as much as possible. The next Saturday came and went and they didn’t have a songwriting session for the first time in who knows how long. It wasn’t that big of a deal. They had enough songs for now. 

Reggie and Alex had clearly noticed something was up, because they were not dumb, but they both seemed to be doing their best to mind their own business. Willie didn’t drift through to watch one time for the whole week and Flynn wasn’t pushing anything because she knew Julie wanted some space from everything. The studio felt bigger and emptier than it had for a while. 

The problem was, Julie didn’t think trying to put a little distance between the two of them was actually making her feel any better about it. Just because the whole thing was making her feel weird and off balance did not mean she hated Luke or really anything close, and it brought her no comfort to see him so put down. Julie thought he would be able to power through this and that his never ending well of passion and drive would be enough to overcome any awkwardness but instead he just looked so _tired_. 

On the Monday that marked it ‘Officially Eats and Beats Week,’ Alex and Reggie came to the house with no sign of Luke. Julie wasn’t expecting to see them considering they had all agreed on a day off, and she was especially not expecting them to use the doorbell when they arrived. She was overcome by a sense of wistfulness for a time that was hardly even a week ago. 

She spent the rest of the day distracted, tossing the new information around in her mind and trying to figure out what to do with it. Sitting in the house was doing her no good and she was starting to get fidgety so she finally decided to go on a walk, maybe stop by the beach, and see if a change of scenery would be enough to impart some wisdom on her. 

Julie was surprised to hear soft music coming from the studio on her way out, considering they had no plans to rehearse and she figured they had all made other plans for the day. She poked her head around the studio door carefully, not wanting to be spotted, and was stunned to see Luke playing his guitar with tears in his eyes. She didn’t recognize the song he was singing as something they had been working on so she leaned in a little closer to try and catch some of the lyrics. 

_If I could take us back, if I could just do that  
And write in every empty space the words “I love you” in replace  
Then maybe time would not erase me  
If you could only know I never let you go  
And the words I most regret are the ones I never meant to leave  
Unsaid, Emily_

Julie pulled her head back, stunned, and took a few steps away from the studio before pausing to regain her head. She felt guilty for listening in on something so personal even though she obviously couldn’t have known. She took off on her walk with haste after that, wanting to get as far away as possible to give Luke his privacy. 

It wasn’t until there was sand beneath her toes and the comforting smell of sea salt washing by with the breeze that she was able to think clearly. 

She thought about what Alex and Reggie told her, how he sometimes went back to his parents house and hid in the yard just to see their faces again, how he would come back with red rimmed eyes that they pretended not to notice. She thought about the tone of finality in those lyrics as if they were written for someone who was already gone. She thought about what he had said to her that day, that he didn’t know if his parents wanted him back anymore, and realized suddenly that she had it all wrong. 

It wasn’t that he didn’t care, it was that he cared too much. He cared so much that he was _terrified_ that it wouldn’t be returned by the two people in the world who meant the most. Luke was just like her, she knew this from the beginning. His music wasn’t just music, it was _him_ and the more they pushed him away from the music the more it felt like an outright rejection of Luke himself. 

Julie’s heart broke for him a little bit as feelings of her own guilt started to creep in. Luke was really hurting, more than any of them probably ever realized. Julie knew logically that she shouldn’t really feel guilty for the way she reacted. It was a tough thing to hear about given her position and she couldn’t help her feelings. Luke clearly knew it too from his reluctance to bring it up to her. Still, she felt bad about misjudging his character like that and she felt extra bad that she wasn’t there for him the way he was for her when she needed it. 

And that thought was what finally gave Julie the real epiphany.

Earlier on, Julie sometimes felt like the boys were sent to her by some higher power just when she needed them to get that piece of herself back. She had thought it was too late for that, too. But it wasn’t, and she was so, so grateful for the way all of them and especially Luke had pushed her to realize that. Maybe, just maybe, the universe wanted her to do the same thing for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> almost done 🥺 given the one chapter per exam pattern I seem to have accidentally gotten myself into, expect the final chapter around the 18th! Thanks to everyone who's left me encouraging comments, it makes my day!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, maybe Julie was upset at him, and maybe it was totally his fault, and they did kind of have a very important gig coming up which would make it bad timing for him to upset their lead singer, on top of the fact that he actually cared about her and felt like garbage for upsetting her even though he kind of couldn’t help it. And maybe he was also having trouble writing songs, which didn’t happen to him very often. But it didn’t mean that he was totally freaking out. Luke did not freak out, as a rule. He was _chill_.

Luke was having a very normal week and he was feeling very normal about everything, which is why he was acting very normal and in a way that would be generally unremarkable to his closest friends. Firing darts at the dartboard as hard as he could was a very normal thing for him to be doing.

“Dude,” Alex said as soon as he walked in, Reggie trailing behind him. “What’s gotten into you recently?” 

Luke threw the last dart in his hand then said “Nothing” very normally, going to get the darts out of the board. “I’m fine.” 

Alex came over to pull some of the less accurate darts out of the wall next to the dartboard, handing them back to Luke. “You know I know you better than that. I can see all the ripped up pages from your notebook, that’s a classic ‘totally freaking out’ move.”

So, maybe Julie was upset at him, and maybe it was totally his fault, and they did kind of have a very important gig coming up which would make it bad timing for him to upset their lead singer, on top of the fact that he actually cared about her and felt like garbage for upsetting her even though he kind of couldn’t help it. And maybe he was also having trouble writing songs, which didn’t happen to him very often. But it didn’t mean that he was totally freaking out. Luke did not freak out, as a rule. He was _chill_. 

“Okay, so the songs aren’t flowing right now, but it’s not that big of a deal. It happens. Writer’s block or whatever.” 

Alex and Reggie shared a look. “So you’ll be fine when Julie gets here for rehearsal in five minutes?” Alex asked. 

“Cause you might scare her if she sees you trying to murder her wall.” Reggie added. 

Julie showed up five minutes later like she was supposed to. Luke was totally freaking out. Julie seemed… less distant than she had been for the past week but she was still giving him these looks every now and then and he hated it. All through rehearsal he kept messing up his parts and singing his own lyrics wrong before Julie stepped in and decided to call it early. Probably because she didn’t want to look at him. She’d been avoiding his gaze all week. Alex and Reggie came over and gave him sympathetic pats on the shoulder, but Luke wanted to keep practicing. 

“I’m _fine_!” he said, probably with a little too much force. 

They couldn’t afford to skip a rehearsal if he was messing up like this. It had to be perfect, there was no other choice. There were going to be managers and industry people and they could really _make it_ and they could make everything worth it. It had to be worth it. The boys, the band, music — it was all Luke had left and if he —

“It’ll be better tomorrow, you just need to clear your head,” Julie cut in, her voice calmly cutting through the noise in his mind. 

Luke looked up in surprise, awkwardly letting go of the guitar strap he had been grabbing way too hard. “I…”

Julie smiled at him gently. “I have an idea, come on. I just have to grab the car keys.”

Julie left the studio, leaving Luke with Alex and Reggie again. “Go,” Alex said, nodding his head towards the doors. “We’ll be here when you come back.”

So Luke put down his guitar and left the studio and went out to the car where Julie was waiting for him. He wordlessly climbed into the passenger seat and Julie pulled out of the driveway, heading out without telling Luke where they were going. She reached over to turn on the radio and fiddle with the stations while Luke jiggled his leg compulsively. He didn’t have the slightest clue what her plan was or what was going through her head. Neither of them said a word until she parked the car at a vista point, and even then they stayed silent for a few minutes. Julie clicked off the headlights and let the night creep in on them. The city lights were always pretty from this far away.

“I’m sorry,” Julie finally said, and Luke nearly snapped his neck with how fast he turned to look at her. 

“I—What?” 

“You’re my friend and you were honest with me about the fact that you’re hurting and instead of being understanding I totally freaked out on you. I should have been there for you, and I wasn’t. So I’m sorry.”

Luke opened and closed his mouth a couple of times, trying to figure out how he was supposed to respond to that. “You’re being too nice to me about this,” he finally said with a frown, because it was true. He had done literally nothing to earn this type of sympathy from Julie when her mom… he couldn’t even imagine. And he had just left. She was still there and he just left without— Julie should be mad at him. He told her as much, feeling immensely guilty.

She put a hand on his wrist. “I was, when you first told me. It felt unfair, that all I’ve wanted, since… is to be able to talk to my mom again even just one time, and you were just _choosing_ not to even though you could.” They were sitting right next to each other in the front seat of the car but Luke couldn’t bear to look at her. He fixed his eyes on the gearshift in between them. She moved her hand back to her own lap. 

“But I know you, Luke. I’ve seen you with Alex and Reggie and the way you all take care of each other, through everything. I’ve seen you singing and playing guitar and writing music so I know how you get when you care because it takes you over completely. It’s the thing I like most about you.” Luke looked up at her tentatively, but she hadn’t been looking at him either. She was looking out the windshield at the city below, her profile lit only by the lights on the display of the car stereo. She shook her head. “I don’t know how I ever let myself think that you didn’t care enough.”

Luke wished he had a guitar with him just for somewhere to put his hands. “Because _I’m_ the one who left, _I’m_ the one who hasn’t gone back. You would have turned around the minute you realized you messed up. You wouldn’t have ever left in the first place.”

Julie sighed. “I’m not a saint, Luke.” She paused to change the station on the radio even though the volume was low enough that Luke had hardly noticed it was on at all. “You’re right, I don’t get it. I can’t, because there has never ever been a moment where I feared that my family would turn me away, like you do.”

“Still, I wouldn’t have to be afraid of that if I hadn’t left.” Luke had been sitting on a lot of pent up guilt for a while, and apparently the only purpose it served was making him argue with Julie. He didn’t want to do that in general and he especially hated the window it gave her into some of his uglier parts, a far cry from the confident front man he liked to be. 

“You made one mistake—one—in the heat of an emotional moment. That doesn't mean you need to suffer from it for the rest of your life.” Luke shifted uncomfortably but didn’t say anything, knowing that Julie wouldn’t appreciate it if he tried to disagree with her on that. She continued after a beat. “I should have seen it, the way you saw yourself in me from the moment we met. You’re grieving too, Luke. You’ve convinced yourself it’s too late for you to ever get your family back.”

“It is,” Luke said and Julie frowned.

“Stop that.” She said, and the first tinge of annoyance he had heard from her all night snuck into her voice. “As long as they’re still here,” Julie said and Luke felt guilty all over again, “there’s time.”

“I just don’t even know what I would do, or what I would say, or—”

“Hey, you don’t have to do it alone, alright? We’ll figure something out together.”

Luke reached over and grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently. Julie threaded their fingers together and squeezed back and that was what finally made the relief wash over Luke, the reassurance that he hadn't lost the most important thing in his life.

It was around one in the morning when they finally headed home. Luke knew that Julie’s dad was cool but he sort of hoped she wouldn’t mention him at all when he demanded answers as to why she was out so late. He didn’t need to piss off _another_ parent. “Reggie’s or the studio?” Julie asked. 

Luke knew the boys would still be waiting for him, even at this hour, so it was an easy answer. “Studio.”

He relished the comfort of the group hug he got after sliding in through the studio doors. After that night, Luke vowed to himself to never be so cagey around Julie again. She was way too good for him, that much was clear, and the least he owed her was honesty. 

There was a second wave of relief that Luke didn’t notice he was waiting for until their rehearsal the next morning. He had known that the band dynamic had gotten a bit awkward and the studio had gotten a bit suffocating but he didn’t understand just how much. Everything had seemingly returned to normal and the difference from the day before was stark. Flynn was on the couch joking with Julie and Reggie, Willie was helping Alex water the plants by the piano, Ray poked his head in briefly to let them all know he was making lunch. The studio just looked _right_ when it was vibrant like this, teeming with life. 

Julie asked Luke to come early the next day to write. “I have a bunch of ideas I’ve been sitting on.” she said. “I want to get them out of my head and on paper.”

Luke didn’t even try to tamp down on his excitement about that, letting a giant grin overtake his face. 

“Aww, you guys.” Reggie said, propping his chin on his hand. “I’m so glad we’re all friends again.”

Alex whacked Reggie’s back as Julie scoffed. “We were never not friends.”

“It _is_ nice that things are back to normal,” Alex offered. “We were worried there for a bit.” 

Luke was already looking at Julie when she glanced over to make eye contact and give him a soft smile, the one that never failed to give him butterflies. She leaned over to bump their shoulders together. “We’re alright now.” 

Julie showed up to their writing session with a box Luke hadn’t seen before. “Watcha got there?” he asked, bouncing on his toes a little in excitement. 

Julie set the box down on the piano and sat at the bench. “Some old lyrics and sheet music and stuff. Songs my mom and I started together but never got to finish.” 

Luke sat down next to her and gestured at the box “Can I?” 

She leaned over and opened it for him. “Go ahead.” 

They sat in silence for a little while as Luke read through some of the songs. “Your mom was an incredible musician.” 

Julie smiled sadly at her hands, twisting one of the many bracelets she always wore. “I know.” 

“You are too, you know. Your mom would be so proud.” Julie didn’t say anything so Luke leaned over to bump their shoulders together. “I’m serious! You have a gift, Julie. You make me a better writer” 

“We make each other better.” Julie said, looking up and making eye contact for the first time since they sat down. “That’s why I brought them here. They _are_ good songs. I want to finish them.”

Luke felt his chest flutter with pride. When they first met this wasn’t something she would have considered. “I want to finish them with you.” She added, and Luke—

“Are—are you sure?” Luke was shocked and touched by the offer. “I mean, I would be honoured, but—” 

“I’m sure. At first I wasn’t, but… I don’t think she would have wanted them to sit in a box forever. It’s music, it’s meant to be heard.” She shrugged, but everything that she was saying was earnest. “I don’t just want to finish them, I want to finish them _well_. We should do it together.”

Luke was, perhaps, short circuiting a little bit. No one had the power to render him speechless in the way Julie Molina could. He recovered as quickly as possible and flashed her a winning grin. “We’ll put her first on the credits when we make our first album.” 

Julie agreed with that suggestion wholeheartedly and then they were off, spreading papers with half finished songs all over the piano and testing out the melodies. There was no word for it other than inspiring. Luke already knew how well he worked with Julie but it had been so long (fine, it was just over a week, but when you’re making that kind of magic it gets addicting pretty quickly) and the addition of her mother’s songs was a spark that drove one of their most productive days ever. It felt like they couldn’t make anything bad, or even just average, and Luke was still riding that high when Julie decided to turn the focus to his own mom.

“So I was thinking,” She started, and Luke laughed.

“That’s dangerous.”

She shoved his shoulder. “Hush. I was going to say I had an idea for you about your parents.”

Luke sobered quickly after hearing that. “Oh?” he said hesitantly. 

“You could invite them to our set next weekend. Maybe if they come see you play—see all of us, together—”

Luke frowned. “So I’m just supposed to walk up after _months_ of being gone, complete radio silence and say, ‘Hey, come to the show,’ and then dip again?”

Julie shook her head. “Why don’t you give them one of these.” She reached down into the box of flyers Flynn made them and placed one in front of Luke. “I know you go back to their house sometimes, just to see—”

Luke froze completely. He thought that had been a total secret. “What? I don’t—”

Julie put her hand on his wrist and gave him a sad smile. “The next time you’re there why don’t you slide one under the door. Like a peace offering.”

Luke looked at the flyer and pretended to read it even though he already knew what it said. He was uncertain about inviting them to see him play given the root cause of their arguments, but he thought about the things Julie said to him in the car the other night. Maybe it would actually be best to do it this way. If he went back but they still hated the band and his music, they would have made no progress. That possibility was more likely than Luke really wanted to acknowledge.

Julie could clearly read the apprehension from his silence. “It was just a suggestion,” she said gently. “If you don’t like it we can think of something else. This should happen on your terms, not mine.”

“What if they don’t come?” It came out too small, too honest. 

“They will,” She said, then something in her gaze hardened. “It’s not on you if they don’t.”

Luke took a couple of seconds to process that before nodding. He slid the flyer all the way in front of him and reached across Julie to grab the pen from the table. He hesitated, making a couple of aborted movements before deciding on adding a simple _-Luke_ in his messy scrawl at the bottom of the flyer. Julie gave him an encouraging look so he picked it up and tucked it between a few pages of his notebook. 

The flyer sat in his backpack like a weight as he made his way back to Reggie’s. He still hadn’t fully made up his mind yet even though he knew what the right choice really was. He let autopilot make his choice for him and found himself numbly making his way back to his house. 

He stopped at the street corner to ditch his bike, wishing he could do this with his eyes closed. That would be a bad idea, probably, unless he wanted to have this reunion flat on his face in the driveway. He did the next best thing, which was breaking out into a sprint to get in and get out as fast as possible. He didn’t check for the nosy neighbours, knowing his parents would learn he came by soon enough, and he slid the flyer under the door and ran back up the street without seeing his surroundings as anything more than a blur. He kept up the pace as he got back on his bike and raced back to Reggie’s, letting himself in and sitting on the floor to catch his breath. 

“Woah,” Reggie said, and he wasted no time in coming over to sit on the floor with Luke before even getting an explanation. “What happened?”

“I was at my parents,” Luke said, and Reggies eyebrows jumped. It was the first time Luke had admitted to one of his visits even though they apparently knew already. “I put one of Flynn’s flyers under their door. It was Julie’s idea…” He trailed off. 

Reggie knew him as well as anyone and he understood what Luke wasn’t saying. He wrapped an arm around Luke’s shoulder and said, with absolute certainty, “They’ll come.” 

They didn’t get up from the floor for a while, even though Luke had long since caught his breath. He stayed tucked under Reggie’s arm and let Reggie chatter on about anything and everything he was thinking about in a way only he could do. It was a nearly foolproof way for Luke to take his mind off of things, and he was feeling much calmer by the time they finally got up to stretch their legs. 

Luke was uncharacteristically nervous in the lead up to their set. Luckily, he didn’t think most people would be able to tell the difference between his nervous bouncing and the amped up bouncing he usually did. Unluckily, all of the people who would be able to notice were standing right around him. 

Alex rubbed his back comfortingly. This was the sort of thing that Alex probably understood best. “You alright, dude?” 

He took a deep breath and shook out his arms as if that would shake the anxiety away. “I’m not gonna know if they came until we get out there, that’s all. Probably best not to think too much about it.”

When they finally got out on stage Julie was starting the song off on her own, which gave Luke a quick chance to scan the crowd. He could feel his heart sinking the longer he looked without seeing them, but finally he caught a glimpse of what he was looking for. They were all the way in the back looking sort of uncomfortable and out of place, definitely not the types to come to a bar and check out the up and coming bands, but they were there nonetheless. He invited them, and they had _come_. 

He made eye contact with Alex and Reggie who had clearly spotted his parents too based on the barely concealed joy on their faces. Luke felt his whole body crackling with electricity as they finally jumped in on the chorus. 

In the time after they got off stage he barely even had time to be nervous again. They were all riding a high after giving what Luke considered to be the performance of a lifetime, and a number of the other acts waiting around offstage clearly knew this too and jumped up to congratulate them. After they slapped some hands and accepted some compliments they grouped up into a band hug that quickly devolved into a lot of jumping and backslapping. They were all feeling the euphoria for more reasons than one and it was hard to contain. 

Luke wiped sweat and hair off his forehead and turned to Julie, ready to dump effusive praises on her for generally being the best, and that's when he saw his parents walking up to them. His heart leapt all the way into his throat. The whole band gathered behind him in support without him even needing to ask. One of them put a steadying hand on his shoulder. _His family_ he thought warmly. _No matter what was about to happen the band was his family. He would always have them._

“So,” his dad was the one who started, trying his best to break the ice. “New band name, huh? Julie and the Phantoms?”

“Tell your friends!” Reggie interjected, leaning over Luke’s shoulder with his trademark enthusiasm. Luke wasn’t looking at any of them but he knew he didn’t have to reach back and smack Reggie because he could hear Alex do it for him. He looked down at his shoes to try and stifle a laugh before looking back at his parents. He was actually kind of thankful for Reggie lightening the mood a little because it was undeniably tense and Luke knew he wasn’t great at these types of emotional conversations. 

Julie slipped a hand into one of his shaking ones, squeezing gently. “Do you want us to stay or go?” 

Luke squeezed back. “I think I got this,” He turned to look at Reggie and Alex too. “I’ll catch up with you guys in a minute.”

He watched his band all leave before he turned back to his parents, not knowing where to start. “I, uh—”

He didn’t get very far before his mom flung herself at him. “Oh, _Luke_ ,” she said and she was already crying and Luke was totally going to have to go back and talk to important industry people looking like a complete mess because his eyes were already welling up too. That was— fine. It was fine. There were more important things, he knew that now, so he buried his face into his mom’s shoulder for the first time in _months_ and let himself sob. She was holding onto him like she was never going to let go again and Luke couldn’t blame her at all because he was doing the same thing. His dad came over and wrapped his arms around both of them and the three of them stayed like that for a while, hugging and crying and not saying a word. 

One day and one hug wasn’t going to fix everything, Luke knew that. There was a long road ahead of them to rebuild what they had lost, but they would get there. Luke was wiping his eyes and trying to reign in his sniffles when they all finally let go of each other. His dad was the first to speak, nodding his head to gesture behind Luke. “Your bandmates look like they’re talking to someone important over there. You can go join them, if you need to.”

Luke glanced over his shoulder to see the other three talking to a professionally dressed woman. “Are you sure?” Luke asked, not wanting to mess this up again. “I’m sure they can handle things without me for a bit.”

“Go,” His mom said gently. “We’ve got plenty of time. There’s dinner at home for three.” 

Luke’s eyes were getting misty again, so he pulled both of them in for another hug. “I love you,” he said and his voice broke but he needed to get it out before he walked away, needed to make sure they knew. He repeated himself with a steadier voice. “I love you.”

His mom rubbed his back and gave him a squeeze. “We love you so, so much honey.” There were tears in her eyes again but she was smiling. Luke closed his eyes briefly to take a deep breath, then rejoined his bandmates. He did his best to put on the charm, though it seemed he hardly needed to based on the impression they already made, and if he kept his shaking hands behind his back the important professionals would be none the wiser. 

As soon as the manager (Luke had already forgotten her name. Or, more truthfully, he was hardly listening when she introduced herself. It had been an overwhelming night. Julie would know, though, and that was more than enough for now) said her goodbyes and swept off somewhere else, Ray swooped in with his fancy camera. 

“Group photo!” he announced, and they were all more than happy to oblige. They were all sweaty and gross and hardly able to get organized into a staged photo, and Luke was sure that was why Ray’s face lit up when he looked at the photos he had captured. He might have told them all he was taking a picture, sure, but the pure joy radiating from all of them was candid and there was no way it didn’t show up. It was a moment Luke was happy to have frozen in time. “Alright, I’ve got it.” He said. “I’ll let you rockstars go.”

“Wait!” Reggie said, and he looked hopeful. “Can we do a silly one?” 

They all laughed, but who were any of them to say no to that?

He slid up next to Julie after and grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently. “I’m gonna have dinner with my parents. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

She looked up at him in silence with a shine in her eyes. He was worried for a second that she was going to cry or something but instead she reached up to give him a tentative kiss on the cheek. She had to get up on her tiptoes a little to do it. It was adorable. Luke could tell by the heat in his cheeks that his face was bright red. 

He didn’t know what else to do but wrap her up in a bone crushing hug. “Thank you,” he said quietly in her ear, as if that would ever be close to enough. Nothing he could do to thank her would ever be enough. When he finally let go he couldn’t help but stare at her in wonder, knowing that Julie Molina was the most special person he ever had the fortune of meeting. 

“Go to dinner,” She said just as quietly as Luke had, “I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

He was reluctant to leave Julie but knew that she was right. They had nothing but time. He hadn’t actually moved yet so Julie made shoo-ing motions at him, but she looked fond. He finally did turn to leave then and took a few steps before turning to look back at Julie one more time. She was looking right back at him and Luke thought _she knows how I feel. There’s no way she doesn't know_ and then she smiled at him, soft and private because she knew. He didn’t even have to say it. 

But he would, when he got a chance. He would say it over and over again until she got tired of hearing it, if he had to.

He wasn’t making that mistake again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that's all folks!! thank you so much to everyone who left a comment or a kudos and especially those of you who left me lovely comments along the way 💕 I deliberately set myself some goals in writing this that were meant to challenge me a bit and you guys were super encouraging and that made it so much easier for me to write. 
> 
> anyways, thanks everyone for reading, hope you all enjoyed!! happy holidays!

**Author's Note:**

> Finally posting my first fic in this fandom and my first ever chaptered fic!! I've got the rest of it like 90 percent written so the updates should be pretty timely! If there's any content warnings I'll add them in the notes for the chapter but in general if you were alright with the show this should be fine. Hope you enjoy :)  
> Title from To Noise Making (Sing) by Hozier. I love feedback of any kind so leave a kudos or a comment if you want and let me know if you caught a typo or something so I can fix it! I'm also on tumblr at tj-hearteyes-kippen if you want to come say hi and yell about this delightful show with me


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